It was 5am before all the emotions in me simmered down enough for me to concentrate on my studies. I had help from Google of course. It's everyone's best friend, isn't it? Mine and many others...
First, Google told me about The Butterfly Project. It was this really cool project for people who were recovering from self injury (SI). You draw a butterfly on your body and before it fades, you're not allowed to harm yourself. But if you do, you have to "kill" the butterfly and draw a new one again.
So, inspired by this project, I decided to do it too. I drew mine as a bonquet of baby breaths, a butterfly breathing in the scent of the flowers as the words faith, hope and love floated in the air.
Then, I hated it. Naturally. I used my saliva to erase it but it didn't work. Damn permanent markers are good huh? I can't tell you what I was thinking then but when I spotted the scissors in my pencil case, it just made sense to me.
No, I didn't cut myself. I merely used the scissors to scrape the skin cells off so the drawing would disappear. Figured it'll work better than an eraser on paper and boy was I right!
I just overdid it a little. Just a little bit. So now I've got abrasions on my left wrist, but that's okay. Google told me that if you want to avoid doing it, try to use ice cubes to place it on the places that you want to do it. I thought ice cubes can numb wounds. What good would it do to quell a SI urge? But I tried it anyway and it didn't benefit me at all.
But it's okay because by that point, I was calm enough to continue studying. So life's good enough for me.
#thethingsIdotocontinueliving
#lifeisawesome
P.S. included the picture of my wrist to prove that the abrasions were not deep wounds at all.
No comments:
Post a Comment